First Love
by Crimson Demon
Summary: This is a prelude to another story that I am working on. This is a story of Haldir's first lover, and what happened to make him so cold to all. Sad, but I think it is really good. Read and Review! enjyoy! Marysue as well. Lol.


            Disclaimer- I do not own the original characters. Duh.  *_Just as a note, never get me hyped up on caffeine, and let me eat S'mores pop tarts, because I become a hopeless romantic*_

This is going to explain why (I think) Haldir is so arrogant, so bare with me. Remember this is a FAN FICTION! It does not have to be perfect.

This _may_ make you cry, that is what it is intended for. I am writing another story on Haldir, *oh god, not another one! * And I needed an old lover, so I made one up, but I decided to go in to her past a little. Muhaha. 

Glamour will be the name of my other story…  Keep waiting for it to come up, I am still working on the rest of it.

1000 years before Glamour.

Chapter 1

Aranel stood on the edge of the River Nimrodel, skipping stones, and singing.  Haldir grinned and silently approached her.  Slowly he wrapped his arms around her slim waist and whispered in her ear. "Hello melamin." He released her and stepped back.  

"Haldir!" she cried. "You came back! You are early!" she jumped on him and hugged him fiercely. He laughed, and spun her around in a circle, then setting her down and kissing her firmly. "I missed you." She whispered happily. She kissed him lightly on the lips, and hugged him to her.  

"Aye, Elan, I missed you too. Lord Elrond sends his greetings, as does Arwen." His voice was low, and he scooped her up, twirling her around some more. 

~          ~          ~

"Do you still have it?" he asked softly once they had stopped spinning and he had sat down under a mellorn tree, with her in his lap.   She reached under her shirt and drew out a locket.  It was a pure gold color, with an inscription on the front. (It was about the size of a quarter.) The inscription read, "_My_ _love for you shall never waver, not death nor sadness shall part us._" 

He studied it and smiled at her. "I am glad you kept it," he said.  "Keep it with you at all times, both when I am with you and when I am not. It will help you remember me." She nodded and tucked her head under his chin. "Do you want to know what I did there?" he asked teasingly.  She yawned and nodded. "Elan, how much did you sleep last night?" he asked pulling away to get a better look at her face.

"Um… not long.  I was busy." She said sheepishly.  He rolled his eyes. 'It figures.' He thought wryly.  He stood up with her still in his arms. He stared at her for a moment and then began to walk. "Do not look at me like that melamin! I was helping Tinevual with the supplies, I did not think you would be here so soon."  She said cuddling closer.  Haldir rolled his eyes again. Aranel's arms wrapped around his neck and she kissed his jaw. "Was it a long journey?" she asked. 

Haldir shrugged keeping his voice nonchalant. "Not too long, about two weeks.  And it was nice in Rivendell; you should have seen this one woman.  Her name was Marina. Talk about a beauty." He glanced down at her when she did not answer.  She was asleep. "Aranel, love, it is no fun to tease you if you are not awake to hear it." he murmured quietly as he walked down the path toward their talan.  

Both of them shared a talan, like most of the couples did, but most of them were married.  To avoid too much protest, mostly from siblings, they pointed out that his was nearer to the healer's flet, so she could get there quicker.  (Not to mention Haldir was planning on proposing to her.)  Galadriel knew this and had no objections to them together. Haldir climbed up the steps, and opened the door. Their talan was simple enough, not too many things decorated the walls.  Both of them preferred the practical to useless junk littering the talan. 

He set her down in the bed and began to unpack as quietly as he could.  His love had an annoying habit to stay up late, helping with whatever she could whenever she could.  Most of the time she would stay at the healer's flet and treat wounds, but sometimes she would help her older sister with making meals, or just cleaning. When she stayed up all night, she usually got up early as well, and that gave her very little sleep.  Elves do not need a lot of sleep, but she could use all that she could. While he admired the fact that she loved to be helpful, it also worried him that she was not getting enough sleep.

A knock came on the door and it opened. "Haldir! You are here." Rumil exclaimed. "The lady said that you were, but Orophin and I could not find you anywhere. How was your trip?"

Haldir glared at him and looked pointedly at the sleeping elf on the bed. Rumil blushed and shrugged in apology. "Give me a minute." Haldir said quietly.  

Aranel shifted again and said quietly. "You just got back, love.  Go and talk.  There is plenty of time to unpack after dinner.  I can help you then." She pulled a blanket over herself after kicking off her shoes. She curled up and a small smile curved on her lips. "Go, Haldir." She ordered drowsily. 

Haldir walked over and kissed her cheek softly and whispered. "I love you."  She nodded and whispered it back, both of them ignoring Haldir's impatient brother who was tapping his foot and pretending to gag.  He gave her a short kiss just to annoy his brother more- it soon turned in to a warm, passion filled one, and Haldir watched as the smile grew on her lips, until when he was dragged away brother.  Literally… 

"Goodnight Aranel…" Rumil said and rolled his eyes, and closed the door. "You are sickening Haldir. Honestly." He said. "You are acting like a lovesick fool." 

Haldir was too happy too be back, so he ignored him.

**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~

"So it was about a week long up and back, not terribly long, but long enough where I am just glad to be home." Haldir finished.  Haldir, Aranel, Galadriel, Rumil, Orophin, and Lord Celeborn were eating dinner, and discussing Haldir's trip.  He took a sip of his wine and smiled at Aranel who was listening to all that was said, and in-between she was eating.  She smiled back at him. They were sitting at opposite sides of the long table, he just in front of her. At the head of the table was Celeborn, and at the other side was Galadriel. 

Aranel smiled politely when Rumil tried to draw her in to a conversation, but she kept it short.  A sudden idea came to her, and almost made her laugh out loud.  She slipped off her satin shoe and moved her leg under the table so it brushed against Haldir's leg.  He glanced at her, and noticed she was smiling _too_ innocently.  He began to talk again, and she slid her bare foot up his leg, and then back down. He nudged her foot and sent her a no-nonsense look, silently telling her to stop.  She grinned in response.  Celeborn began to speak of _something_; Aranel thought it had something to do with how diplomacy's from two different Men civilizations were failing, or something to that effect. It was all very boring and she was not sure anymore.  

She slid her foot up and down his leg, and watched as he tried to keep his attention on his Lord but failed miserably. _'I give him another few seconds.'_ An amused voice said in her head. Aranel glanced at the lady who had a tiny smile of mirth on her face. '_A minute at most. You are being quite mean to him you know.  He is barely keeping himself under control. Do think how embarrassing it would be for him make a fool of him self. But my dear, that is **not** a suggestion…' _ 

Aranel giggled, then tried to hide it by sipping her wine.  Rumil gave her an odd look and she schooled her face to be emotionless. She batted her eyelashes at Haldir whose eyes were fixed on her own, no longer listening to Lord Celeborn.  Slowly, deliberately, she pushed up his trousers slightly on his right leg and slid her foot up and down the bared skin. His normally crystal blue eyes were a dark sapphire color, and she let a tiny smile curve on her petal red lips.  

"And Haldir is paying no attention to what we are saying, beings as he is too focused on Aranel." Rumil commented stretching. All was quiet for a moment, and Celeborn cleared his throat.  Haldir snapped his attention to his lord, a faint blush on his cheeks. "Say, Haldir _were you busy?_" Rumil said with a wicked smirk.

"No…no I was just… preoccupied, please forgive me. Do continue." Haldir's voice was clipped.  Aranel took a bite of her salad and began to listen again.  Occasionally she would brush against his leg just to see him jump slightly. He glared at her each time, but even she saw his heart was not in to the glare. About an hour later, Galadriel stood.

"I think that it would be best if we all retired.  Aranel could I have a word with you before you go?" she glanced at Haldir as the others stood up and began to leave.  Aranel nodded and walked over to Haldir.  His eyes were still a dark blue, and she hugged him close, and felt him put his lips against her ear.

"I will get you back for that melamin." He growled possessively in her pointed ear, before kissing her thoroughly.  He bowed to Galadriel and left.  Aranel stood with a silly smile plastered on her fair face and turned to Galadriel. 

"Aranel, please listen to me.  I know that you wish to sleep with Haldir, but I think it would be best for you to wait until you are married." She said bluntly.  The elf queen had an odd expression on her face.

"Why ever not?" Aranel asked puzzled. Galadriel only repeated her original statement. "Galadriel, if you can not give me a legitimate reason, then I can not promise anything." 

Galadriel sighed and nodded in defeat She had said the same thing to Haldir, but he had just shrugged. "As you wish.  But I do have a question.  Could you go to Rivendell for me tomorrow? I need a package delivered, and I know you wish to see Arwen."  Aranel brightened visibly and nodded before leaving.

  'Please wait. I am not able to tell you why you should not sleep together; it may interfere with the future.' Galadriel prayed. 'Just wait for a while.'

~**~**~**~**~**~**

Aranel walked down to their talan, thinking about why she would not want Haldir and her to have sex.  Was it because they were not married? But that would not make sense; unmarried elves had sex all the time. Well not _all_ the time maybe but still…

She opened the door and was surprised when she saw Haldir was already in bed.  She smiled; he must have been more tired than she was.  Stripping off the dark green dress that she had worn for dinner, she dressed in a light shift, and then lit a lamp so she could see well, but not wake Haldir up. She pulled her hair down and then brushed through it quickly before drawing back the sheets and slipping in beside Haldir. She cuddled up to him and squeaked when he pulled her closer. "I promised I would get you for that fun during dinner." he murmured in her ear. She blushed and rolled over to face him. "And this is that time." 

He brushed his lips over hers, teasingly and then halted a breath away. "Haldir…" she whispered quietly before he forcefully kissed her, pulling her closer.  She moaned and felt his hands begin to undo the ties on her shift slipping a strap over her shoulder.  

She in turn began to unbutton his shirt, feeling the smooth skin and large muscles. She pulled it off, sliding it off his broad shoulders and resting her hands on them. He straddled her waist and began to trail open-mouthed kisses down he neck, nipping at the sensitive skin. Her brown eyes were closed in pleasure and all thoughts of Galadriel saying this was wrong flew from her mind. 'If this is wrong why does it feel so right?' she thought feeling him above her. 

"I love you." He whispered, his lips against her collarbone. She shivered and tangled her fingers in his silky hair, barely able to string two words together. 

"I… I love…" she started, but stopped abruptly when his lips covered hers again, fervently. "Haldir…" she moaned again.  Dizziness swamped her and then she managed to whisper, "I love you too." before she was swept away by completely new feelings.  

The next morning, she was awoken by a pair of lips on hers, much like the night before. "Good morning love." He said warmly. She mumbled something, and not quite being awake, it was hard to understand. He chuckled and she felt his laughter from her head on his broad chest. She snuggled closer. 

"Tis' too early." She murmured. He laughed again. "Please?" she said softly.

He laid back on the pillows, letting her use his chest as a warm pillow. "As you wish, I am content to just hold you in my arms." He said quietly. And he was.  He fell back asleep, feeling her comforting weight on his chest. 

Later that morning found the two of them with tears in their eyes. "I will miss you." She whispered. He nodded. "I will return as soon as I am able too. I promise. Amin mela lle."

He mumbled it back and held her close, still knowing he had to let her go. "I love you so much." He whispered. "I think last night proved it," he said with a small smile.  She nodded, and mounted, and the 12 Elven guards followed her.  Haldir smiled at her and watched as she left the horizon.  "Lets get ready for watch." He said to Rumil.  Rumil nodded and both went to fetch their weapons.

***

Aranel rode on about 2 hours later, and thought of Haldir. His kind face, his beautiful eyes, his tender embrace… she barely heard the shout. "Lady Aranel! Run! You have to get back to the Woods! We are under attack!" a guard screamed as an arrow struck him.  

Aranel paled and wheeled her horse around and shouted, "Noro lim! Noro lim!"  But she could not get away. She tried to drive her horse to the left, but it panicked and reared, Aranel fell back with a painful thud.  The breath was knocked out of her, and she was momentarily stunned.  It was all the time that was needed by a large orc; he pounced on her and smiled, a grotesque attempt. 

"Oh no…" she whispered, knowing what would happen.  The dying screams of the elves around her made her blood run cold. "Oh Valar protect me. Haldir? Please melamin…" 

***

Anguished screams of pain reached Haldir's acute ears, and he paled when he realized where they were coming from. "Rumil, Orophin! Do you hear that?" he asked. The brothers nodded, and they began to run, Haldir fearing the worst.

He raced in to the clearing, and not sensing any orcs or evil he told Rumil and Orophin to run and get the lady while he searched for the one person he was afraid of finding.

"Melamin?" he asked, voice shaking as he came upon the slaughtered bodies.  A flash of her light brown hair caught his eyes, it came from the long grass. The stench of blood and dead elves overwhelmed his sharp senses.  He saw his love, and began to run to her. 

"Melamin!?" his was strangled. The elvish woman laid broken, bruised, and bleeding on the wind blown grass. She opened her eyes, and they slowly focused on him.  He dropped to his knees, and as gently as he could stroked back the once silky hair from her cool and pale face. Blood was smeared on her cheek, and he realized it was hers when he saw the large gash on her forehead.  She took in quivering breaths, the much-needed oxygen filling her lungs. 

"H-Haldir?" she gasped softly when she tried to move.  Haldir could not see the sword wound in her side, her ripped clothes hid something at least.  "Is it y-you?" her honey brown eyes locked on his own and he swallowed at the extreme amount of pain, horror, and fear in their depths. 

"Aye' melamin. Tis me." He stroked her cheeks gently wiping away the dirt and grime and tears. Carefully he placed feather light kisses in their stead. She struggled to sit up, and he stopped her and wrapped his cloak around her.  Her shredded and ripped clothes did nothing to help cover her fair and delicate skin.  "Oh my love. I am so sorry," he whispered drawing her slim body in to his arms, feeling her body shake in pain and exhaustion. He stroked her cheek.

"I-I am s-s-sorry. I t-t-tried to get a-a-away." She said softly. "They g-g-got me, but all I-I-I would- could t-t-think of was y-y-you." She reached a trembling hand up to stroke the face of her lover. "Amin mela lle." Her voice was withholding tears, pain and love. 

He took her hand in his own and massaged it gently, pressing warm kisses to it, and nuzzling the smooth skin.  He gently supported her quivering body with his arms, feeling her slim frame against his own.  "Oh Valar.  Please do not do this to me. Amin mela lle.  I love you so much. You cannot leave me alone here." He pressed his lips to hers, hoping to feel their silkiness again.  She opened her lips, accepting him in to her mouth, and delicately kissing him back. Tears ran down her face, and neck. Some were his; some were hers.  Pain racked her body as she tried to shift in his grasp to hold him to her. A cry of completely throbbing pain escaped her lips. 

"Oh melamin. I am sorry. I should not have let you go out with out me.  I should have arrived sooner." He rested his forehead on her own, looking in to her eyes. 

"It was not y-y-your fault." She whispered. "You s-s-silly elf.  You… y-y-you always d-d-do that, blame y-y-yourself for that w-w-which is not your f-f-fault. I love y-y-you for i-i-it " She laughed, but it turned in to a cough and when she removed her hand she saw blood. "Melamin, I do not have much time left.  P-p-promise me something." 

Haldir nodded, kissing the smooth column of her neck, nuzzling the skin cool. "Anything my love." He murmured. "I love you." 

"Promise me, y-y-you will n-n-not follow me." She managed to get out.  Her body was gradually shutting down from the results exhaustion and aftershocks of violence, and both knew it.

"What do you mean?" he asked, his voice wavering.  She kissed his lips, pouring what little strength left in her body in to the kiss.

"Do not follow m-m-me in to M-m-Mandos. Stay here; live here until you are c-c-called across the sea. I-I-if you c-c-can find another, please love h-h-her in m-m-my place."  She said softly against his lips. She pulled back and let her fingers rest on his lips stopping any thing he was about to speak.  "Please."  Her voice was pleading as she watched him.

"Melamin." He tried, but he saw the firm resolve in her eyes.  "I-I-I promise." He whispered. She smiled, in joy and he was reminded of how she had looked the night before, joyful. "I love you. I never stopped, and never will."

"I love you. F-f-forever, and…" her voice dropped off, her hand stroking his face once more before slowly falling limp to the ground.  Her breath escaped her motionless lips, her eyes closed forever.  Her body relaxed in his grip. 

"Melamin…" he whispered. He kissed her lips, still slightly warm, and it was then that he accepted it.  She was gone, never to return. He would never hold her in his arms again, never be able to kiss her lips, and never curl up with her on the warm grass, hold her in his arms and just talk or share soft embraces. They would never have another moment together.  "I love you." He spoke softly, cradling her to him, tears still running down his face. "I will always love you."

~          ~          ~

Galadriel ran down the path, her skirts held up high enough so she could run.  All of the sudden she stumbled and Rumil had to grab her quickly before she fell. "What is it?" Rumil asked, still supporting her.

"No…" Galadriel whispered. "She can't have… not after I told them both not to… she would not have done so." She felt pain shoot through her, Haldir's pain at loosing his lover. "No!" she cried out as a sharp pain raced through her heart.  She fell to the ground on her knees, clutching her heart as pain ripped through her. If this was Haldir's pain she was feeling, it must have been many times worse for him, she only picked up enough senses to let her know what the person was feeling. No more than that. 

She got up again, and began to run as fast as she could, knowing that Aranel was already gone.  As they ran in to the clearing, Galadriel felt profound grief, anger, and sorrow coming from the blonde elf. She was aware of Rumil stopping not more than a few feet away, with a sharp gasp at the sight.  Orophin wrapped his arms around his younger brother, trying to comfort him, while he too was crying at the loss of whom he liked to think of as his little sister.

Galadriel bit her lip to keep her emotions in check, but in the end fell to her knees beside the still body of Aranel and the weeping body of Haldir. She was wrapped in his cloak, and her brown hair spread like a halo.  Haldir was sobbing as quietly as he could, but Galadriel understood. She drew the elf in to her arms, and tried to comfort him. "Shh," was the most she could say at that time, she was still crying.  

"She… she should not have died." Haldir whispered.  "How could the Valar do this? She was innocent!  She has never done any thing wrong in her life, and yet they torture both her and me.  Elves are immortal! She was suppose to live forever, but…" he began to sob again.  "I loved her. I loved her more than anyone else I ever have, and yet she was ripped away from me.  It is not fair!" 

Galadriel could say nothing, except a small prayer for Aranel's soul, hoping it would find peace. "She made me promise that I would take another lover if I could find one.  And that I would not follow her in to Mandos.  Does she realize how impossible this will be? I cannot live without her. I love her too much to let her go." 

Galadriel murmured, "Haldir, it is not for us to decide who shall leave Middle Earth, and who shall say.  We have no control over that. You should not have to bear this burden though. No one should have to lose a lover."

"I will not lose another one close to me." He vowed angrily. "I wont lose another." 

His heart became incased in ice, and he shut himself out from the world.  He eventually became March Warden, to help protect Lothlorien, and every night he thought of his lost love, which he would never see again.

Ahhhhh!  This is sad, but necessary I think.  Please, please! Please! Review as many times as you want! Once or one hundred times! Tell me what you think!  I will have the next part out as soon as I am able I promise.

Love you all lots!

~*~*~Crimson~*~*~

Elan- star in elvish, at least that is what it says… 

Mela- love

Melamin- my love


End file.
